Tomorrow's Number

Sitting here once more in silence. The house is eerie and still.
And I am trying to find a voice to say just how I feel.
The problem isn't the voice, though, it's the thoughts inside my head.
Leaving me confused and tattered, my emotions left for dead.
Everything has misted over, no fear do I now know.
I am not even sorry to say I have to go.
Life and love have been a rollercoaster ride.
But I have many great friends remaining by my side.
And I know that I will have another tomorrow.
And though that tomorrow is limited, I feel no sorrow.
My life has been of my own making, be it heaven or be it hell.
It was me who bore myself up when into the insanity I fell
for I hid it from so many, the best, at least, that I could.
But I never asked for assistance; I knew I never would.
But destiny gave me the friends I needed when I needed them most,
and when my time comes at last, I hope my memory remains, a ghost
of smiles and tears, of laughter and fears, of sorrow and joy
and a reminder, that a heart is not a toy.